Being InLove vs Friendship, which is underrated


What is the big deal about being “inlove” and why do some of us seem to want it so much? Oh, right…because of things like serotonin and  oxytocin which increase dopamine levels; all the things that make “chemical love” so addictive.  By the way, all addictive drugs increase dopamine levels which is why drugs are ADDICTIVE! If I am going to have love, I’d rather have the stable kind, such as agape love, or even better..phileo love: these are REAL feelings of love that aren’t chemically based.  Who really wants someone to be addicted to them for the “high” they are providing  for them? I know I wouldn’t want to be replaced by a different “drug” because this new one makes my boyfriend or husband feel “higher”! Ladies and gentlemen: There are people in this world who both consciously and subconsciously seek  new highs to increase their dopamine levels; he/she will get bored with you and move on, eventually, or you will have a cheater on your hands. I will write about this chemical love in a future post; it’s quite interesting.

This is why I believe that I would rather be in a relationship with, or be married to someone who is my FRIEND.  If you ask generally happy couples who are married for at least 25 years what their secret is, they all say friendship.  I don’t know about other people, but I would rather spend my life with someone who I am comfortable with,  who I trust with life’s important things, someone who I know that I will STILL enjoy sharing a meal with in 20 years because I enjoy their conversation, someone who cares about my personal growth as a human being and ENCOURAGES that growth, someone who I don’t have to be afraid to tell how I REALLY feel about any and everything that I feel like sharing, someone who is a pleasure to travel with, someone who honors and KEEPS commitment: THAT is friendship.  If we can have those things and also have a great sex life, what else could I possibly ask for? And if we end up falling inlove from time to time, that’s just icing on a cake that is already a GREAT cake.


4 Responses to “Being InLove vs Friendship, which is underrated”

  1. *applauds wildly*

  2. So true…

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